it's all happening

DAY ONE in a new city that i have never seen before, where you can buy beer at the movies (DREAM REALIZED) and strip clubs are where you play billiards.


jill's lobby. nicer for pics than my hardware store full length on back of door, no?
also: reallllly into my mood ring! bring it back!

things that happened:

1. i saw one of my very best friends from growing up for the first time in 10 years. he looks the same, but with sideburns (DOPE) and about 200 more tattoos. it felt like no time passed, i hope i see him every day.

2. i drank a lot of beer. i want to drink less beer, but that may NEVER HAPPEN. i am poor now and beer is cheap.

3. went to a bbq at a serrrriously dope 3 floor apartment that was only marginally more rent than my glorified closet on 2nd street back in ol loisaida. ew, portland, ew.


ace hotel photobooth. i'm a wonkeyeye okay?

4. i was accosted at said bbq by a girl who said she wants to fall in love with me on a train (and your name is...?) and then showed me photos from her ex-lover from NYC: a current SNL castmember who sent her pics of HIS MEMBER and it is...a nice size. i actually shrieked.

***i would like to use this moment to go over life standards & practices 101: any kind of nakez pics you send to anyone will ALWAYS be shown to their friends. ALWAYS. just saying.

5. i am staying with my friend jill who couldn't be a better hostess. and she has empire records on dvr. gonna have to come up with a mayjah good thank you present.

6. veeverz is here until saturday..i think there will be epic debauchery tonight.
her last words to me before we left the bar last night: "you better bring your lip gloss tomorrow night, because you are getting SO BLOGGED, BITCH".
scared?

i also tried to get her to set me up with zach galifianakis but he's too famous now; shoulda gone for it pre-The Hangover. DRATS!

MENTAL NOTE: start taking pictures of shit other than yrself, loser.