5/10/10

giveaway: stand up comedy x whitney totes !

A few weeks ago I wrote about the limited edition handmade/screened/numbered art book totes that Portland's Stand Up Comedy made for The Whitney here in NYC.



Well sometimes life is good, brahskevitches. The very cool people at the Whitney sent me a S.U.C.xWHITNEY tote of my very own, and I am complety in hearts with it.

YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN YOU MIGHT HAVE TO JAM

This is essentially what I carry around on my person most days:
Magazines, various composition notebooks, my hideous wallet (anyone have any recs on a new one? I'm desperado), flash drive, comb (the only way to keep your bangs like Peggy Moffitt's), Karen Walker sunglasses, my keychain with Miu Miu ribbon and "self-defense kitty" that I bought when I was 15. (Your fingers go through the eyes and you stab with the ears! DANGER!), tiny red notebook from Kiosk (I love notebooks from Kiosk. I love anything from Kiosk!), felt tip pens, business cards (WERK), Dior Skin Sculpt concealer, Marc Jacobs mirror, Bobby Brown cheek color, Mustela hand lotion, a stamped leather vintage..ciagarette pack holder (???) that is perfectly iPod shaped, my iPhone (aka my siamese twin).

This is a pretty normy day. Sometimes there is weird random shit in my bag..recently some of the weirder things have been: Korean ice cream sammies (shaped like fish!!), the first season of Beverly Hills 90210 on DVD (so key), Ouzo flavored chocolates for my dad and about a thousand paint chips from Home Depot.

You can fit a LOT in this lil tote and since it was designed to carry heavy monographs, you can really pack it in there. Or at least I do. Which is an easy way to give yourself a gangsta lean. Which is why I recently invested in a backpack.

BUT I DIGRESS.

HERE COMES THE BEST PART:
The Whitney also gave me 3 totes to give away to you, dear White Lightning readers ! I have one in each color and I really want you to have them.
 


Leave me a comment with the weirdest thing you've ever carried around in your bag. The 3 best answerersss get a tote.

GOOD LUCK & GET WEIRD!

118 comments:

Lydia Hudgens said...

the weirdest thing i ever had in my bag was a butt plug, handcuffs & blindfolds.. out for a fun filled evening!

the cat whisperer said...

My dead hamster, Lucifer. He was SUCH MY LITTLE GENTLEMAN.

When I found him in his cage, immobile, one morning, I called my friend Jim, who is a taxidermist (for reals), and who said to bring Luci down to the shop so he could stuff him for me. I wanted him to be put into some majestic pose, like... sitting in a chair with a smoking jacket, or skiing down a little hill or something.

Anyways, Jim wasn't there by the time I made it, and I ended up toting Lucifer around for the day because I had a lot of errands to run. He was in a Ziploc bag and I kept accidentally grabbing him when I reached for something else.

The best/worst part of this story is that he died three years ago, and he is STILL in my freezer (totally wrapped and in a box) because Jim moved away and I still want to take him to a taxidermist.

You're like "you don't win but I am def blocking you, you creep..."

hannah zbitnew jagger said...

hello kitty nail clippers and a staple-less stapler. (useful)

PIZZA said...

As of this very moment (after a brief trip to my mom's house for mother's day) I have in my purse:
- egg timer
- cocktail napkins that my mom thrust in my hands, all the while saying "I'm too old to entertain! You take them!"
- a whole stack of LL Bean/Lands End catalogues that're sent to my parents house (they're the first thing I read when I visit - SO MANY DEALS!)

Sarah said...

I carried around a bean soft taco for about 2 days after I had forgotten that I not-so-intelligently slipped it in in my purse for safe keeping instead of getting a doggie bag after a few too many margaritas. That bag hasn't forgiven me since!

cmh said...

after i donated my hair, i carried the 14" ponytail around in my bag for a year. maybe got a bit attached?

Blanca said...

In tenth grade, I happened to visit a Joe's Crab Shack with some friends. One of them thought it'd be a good idea to fling a red bean & rice covered shrimp at me.
WELL, my purse happened to be in my lap at the time, and it just so happened that we couldn't find the shrimp right after she tossed it.
I figured it fell on the floor, so we forgot about it.

It took me two days and a little bit of rotting stink to figure out that the shrimp actually fell in my bag...

saint vitus said...

A personal sized watermelon...to sneak into a movie theater.

It was a big, big purse and I love watermelon.

I got away with it!

samantha said...

at all times i keep with me packets of malt vinegar (TOTALLY vital), various items stolen from the doctors office (tongue depressor, throat swab, latex gloves), receipts dating back to god knows when (some of them aren't even mine. i love to read detailed lists of purchased items when i'm bored, especially if it wasn't my money spent), an outdated scientific calculator(again wholly necessary), a japanese hologram compact, and my vibrating furby/ouija board/beagle key chain. for the record though, i don't consider any of those items weird. my friends, however, think my grecian yarn bag is a treasure trove of the bizarre.
just realizing that you asked for weirdest thing, emphasis on the lacking plurality. unfortunately, there have been far too many strange things in my many bags over the course of my living, so the normal fare will have to do.

Suzy said...

i'll tell you what wasn't ever in my purse, and that's my cat. because that would be weird right?!!!

something i CAN admit to, on the other hand, is being a nanny with a lot of handkerchiefs on hand at all times. the little dudes see me use them all the time so one day when we were at the park one of them must've wanted to save a worm for later in the same manner that i might save the rest of a cookie. so gross, but totally cute that he used one of the prettier lace ones. this worm was special.

Fayoona said...

one morning after a house party, i discovered a sheets of tinfoil, a "borrowed "pair of red raybans and a large amount of glitter. along with a sock i use for change.
on a daily basis, my bag generally has a bag of some sort of seeds and again the sock purse. not so exciting.
xx fi
http://saveourshoes.blogspot.com

trixx said...

hmm - really truly my siamese cat - who by the by, is driving me crazy right now with all of her "i want in! no! i want out!" Anyways, i live in montreal and don't trust crazy drivers here... so when she decides she wants to go out-outside and not just in the stair well i stick her in my purse and we go to the parc! i think she feels safe in there but she likes new things just like me and might like a new tote for toting around in! ;)

Hard Liquor, Soft Holes said...

i told you this this weekend, but not in the context of FREE STUFF.

anyways, i was at an ENGINEERING FRAT party and decided it'd be an awesome idea to steal a bong. so i stuck it in my tote bag and left the party, laughing all the way.

until i noticed it still had bong water in it and it spilled all over and leaked out of my canvas tote.

GIMME A NEW BAG!!

Mellsz Bellsz said...

When I picked up my new kitten, McLovin, I carried him in my bag on the train. I was feeding him treats and cooing at him. I looked like a schizophrenic terrorist.

Also: two elephant statue things, which now hold my jewelry. On public transit. At 7:00 PM in the evening.

Rebecca A said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rebecca A said...

I always take the skymall magazine with me after a plane ride. Mainly, I carry it around for at least two weeks showing off/thinking I will purchase the hideous bathing suit you can get a tan through or the dog orthopedic comfy couch...in addition to every other incredible invention in that masterpiece of a magazine.

Melissa said...

These elephants:
http://bit.ly/elephantelephant

I discovered like a year after I got the same exact thing on my left forearm. Weird, but awesome.

Rachel said...

My brother's hermit crab, Gavi. He wore a Superman shell and was kind of a badass (he's dead now, unrelated incident, and resting somewhere off the Coney Island pier). Anyways, my bro thought it would be sweet to take Gavi out for the afternoon to the beach (You know, like how one might take a doglet to the park). He's not a bag carrying boy so despite gross icky crabby feelings I ended up with a hermit crab in a Superman shell in a tupperware on the subway to Brighton Beach. Gavi totes had the best day eva!

Amy Grace said...

I carried a cheese grater in my purse for a full three weeks before I remembered it was there. Cheese is important, though, so it's probably better I had it. In case of a cheesemergency.

Rachel said...

I think the weirdest thing was probably a big bag of weed for almost a year. I had smoked with a friend the night before an academic competition (nerd), and had no way to drop it off before I left the next morning. I was already paranoid as it was, but I remember being extra anxious that day, thinking that the smell would emanate every time I opened my bag for my wallet or a pencil. I ended up winning the competition and the medal came in this cool velvet pouch. I managed to squeeze the entire ziploc bag of weed in there, and sprayed some Chanel perfume all over it. I forgot about it for almost a year, except for the times that I'd cross the Border Patrol checkpoint (I'm in Texas), when I'd feel especially dangerous. I finally ended up putting it in some baked goods one bored evening, but until then everything that came out of my bag had a wonderful piney scent to it.

Amy said...

My friend got into a fight at a party and lost a tooth. For some reason the conclusion was reached that I should save it for him to make sure they could... reattach it? I'm not 100 percent why exactly we decided to save it.

Then I forgot about it and 3 days later I took out my wallet to pay for coffee and a tooth came flying out. Prettty sure I looked like a serial killer. Or the Tooth Fairy.

Gena said...

-astros ticket stub
-testamints spearmint gum (powerful fresh breath, powerful message)
-picture of an old man i found in half price books
-approximately 15 moist towelettes
-mini legal pads
-6 pens
-banana
-high school graduation beer cozy
-nail file from local election

Girl from the Internet said...

in high school, i made a photo album of the 16 times that i saw and met good charlotte. i carried it everywhere, because, you know, you never know when you may be in a pop punk emergency or have to prove your once-or-twice backstage vicinity to benji madden to a non-believer. it was a plaid album that never left my gwen stefani l.a.m.b. concert bag. i came across it when i moved into my first apartment in brooklyn 3 years ago and immediately called my friends and family to apologize and thank them for sticking by a super fan. the mortification of just admitting that should earn me the whitney bag, no?

p.s. there were captions...

Jay said...

Chocolate Orange flavored lube. To school. An all-girls Catholic school, to be exact. Oooops.

Detta said...

Oh I just had to get a piece of this post,some of these answers are so funny!There was once a time where I was so obsessed with the fictional character Brian Slade that I carried around the dvd Velvet Goldmine everywhere!The other things not as fun,but dog breath mints and a heart shaped rock i found on the road also make the list.

Amanda said...

besides packets of soy sauce, tea bags, and sugar, i've been known to tote my large grey pet rat Sophie in my purse, because i enjoy the disgusted looks on people's faces when i tell them my beloved pet is a rat, and then even more disgusted looks when i present her to them! Oh well, I love her and she's the most adorable thing ever!

BTW the yellow tote is FAB!

Amanda
veggiegirl90@gmail.com

aleks said...

i used to carry a giant quilted gold lamé monstrosity. it was so large it could easily fit 2 six packs or a jug of wine with room to spare for all the other random crap i carry around (hair straightener, silk screen + squeegees, multiple nailpolish bottles, 4 notebooks, 10 + pens, etc). i had that thing until the gold started to flake off and the straps broke. r.i.p. good ol' goldie.

rosina. said...

I have randomly started to collect bottle caps. I realized two years ago that i had some floating at the bottom of my purse, and ever since then, i've decided to keep them, throwing in new ones whenever I opened a cold one. I've got close to a hundred jingling in ma purse.

meg said...

a fireplace lighter, three empty glasses stolen from Star Shoes, 30 packs of equal, an old school telephone headset and one flip flop.

los angeles is a helluva drug.

meg said...

or the morning after your sister's birthday party when i woke up with six mini bottles of vodka, 80 dollars in cash, a tube of mascara that didnt belong to me, a washcloth and two triple a batteries in my purse.

its a toss up.

rachelrose said...

the strangest thing i ever had in my bag was embroidery (i'm embroidering the constellations on a t-shirt) and a bottle of tequila. my embroidery that night was slightly less steady than it usually is.

joy said...

Men's shaving cream was magically in my bag all last summer when I went on a trip. The weirdest part is I don't remember how it got in my bag. I did, however, use it. Men's shaving cream works great!

JD
iplayfaves.blogspot.com

Bealerr said...

an open pot of wagamamas- WHICH I DIDN'T SPILL.

a snow ball- HE NEVER SUSPECTED A THING :D

pleasepleaspleasepleascanihavetheyellowoneprettyprettyplease :)

http://odmarkandthekelpies.blogspot.com/

j.sims said...

Weirdest things right now: can opener, jar of Nutella (vital), stamps, two spoons, lint roller, tribal mask I got two summers ago in Ethiopia (not quite sure HOW it ended up there, I just haven't taken it out...), heart-framed picture of Richard Nixon. The latter is just one of those THINGS, ya know?

BFACE said...

A bread bowl with French onion soup in it...tricky, but worth it!

Mandy said...

Cheeseburgers!

Best weirdest purse item and hands down the most tasty!

angsthase said...

A few weeks ago, in the same bag at the same time, I had: the plastic torso of a man whose organs could be removed and a statue, about the size of my hand, of a devil, with long eyelashes and wire horns, wearing a green diaper. The devil has since disappeared. I put this down to either devil trickery or a pickpocket with a penchant for the occult.

Chelsea said...

A friend's turtle, so he could play on stage with us at Carnegie Hall.

[He was successful, the turtle was thrilled. The following year he tried to bring his rabbit, which didn't work out as well. Needless to say there is some animosity between the two of them now...]

Elisa said...

uh, this is kinda similar to the gerbil or whatever but I found a dead squirrl on the side of the road and decided I was going to taxidermy it...it chilled in my purse for like 5 hours though cuz I had to go to class then peep some kittens at the pet store.

I eventually taxidermied it and you can actually see a picture of it on my blahhhg.

Also, apparently we have a mutual friend? Andrew Dubow?

alex said...

Ha this is funny.

I went through a phase of stealing starbucks mugs when they still used them in Britain (STICK IT TO THE MAN!) so at one point I had those taking up valuable bag-space. It was worth it just so I could make myself enormous mugs of coffee at home while smugly remembering the day I won back a tiny proportion of the money I have spent at Starbucks over the years.

I've also had pot brownies in there, a weird comic strip a priest on the streets of Vegas gave me detailing how all nations who have mistreated Jews have all suffered in some way and some cheddar cheese from the night I got really wasted, bought some cheese covered chips, poured the entire thing in my bag (presumably to save for later) then fell asleep on a bench. Needless to say I was very confused the next day when I found this in my bag.


http://coldcoconuticecream.blogspot.com/

T-Bonz said...

There is no nepotism rule, right? These are the strangest things I have ever had that I can remember:


-My crown from my root canal, stuck in the caramel that pulled it out (that I almost bet in a poker game)

-A laminated copy of one of Dan's mom's Visas or green card or something way to official for me to have. not a CLUE how I got it.

-An IKEA Allen wrench

sara zucker said...

the weirdest thing i've ever carried in my purse has had to be (and get ready for TMI alert) a urine sample for a lab test. thank god i closed the lid tightly enough, otherwise one trip (and i trip a LOT) would have left me smelling like the homeless man who sleeps on the steps of my town's church.

HAL said...

Okay ... this is so weird and humiliating, but when I was young we had these little birds. They were finches. One of them got out of the cage and flew into a window and died. My mom was a little nuts around this time, and she decided the bird was so beautiful she wanted to get it stuffed and put it on a wreath. However my mom had never had anything stuffed before and didn't know how to go about it, so she stuck the bird in the freezer for like a week. Then when she decided she wanted to get it stuffed (which clearly she couldn't at this point), she stuck it in her purse and we went driving to the taxidermist. It wasn't my bag as I was like 7 years old, but that's the weirdest thing I've ever experienced anyone carrying around in their purse firsthand. A dead, frozen bird.

And like the above poster, I've had to carry many urine samples around in my purse recently while waiting for the OBGYN to see me. It's better than walking around with it casually in the waiting room, LOL.

halcoholic@gmail.com

HALCOHOLIC.com

Erin said...

The weirdest thing I've ever had in my bag... a medium sized "Kramer Painting" print ( http://www.google.com/images?hl=en&q=kramer+painting&um=1&ie=UTF-8&source=univ&ei=JlnoS5ajJ4O4swPOzOzvCA&sa=X&oi=image_result_group&ct=title&resnum=1&ved=0CDQQsAQwA ) gold frame and all. Thank god for big bags and friends who can create even big diversions. Stolen from some frat house in college, pre-Michael Richards drunk racism scandal when it was still mega-hip.

Ella said...

Errm, mine sucks, but here goes: vietnamese sand (from a little village called Hoi An, actually). i went to vietnam last xmas (i live in paris) with my family, and i wanted a souvenir from Hoi An, i guess? so i stuffed some sand from the beach into my bag. it's still in my bag at the moment actually

Cherie said...

Ummm, mine is kinda lame, but like twenty of those little mustard packets? I was really bored once at a volleyball game so me and my friend found a random kitchen in the school the game was in and stole like thirty of those mustard packets. I found them a few months later. They were all gross.

sweetheart said...

Ah man I love all the essentials you've got going on.

The wierdest thing I've carried? Hmm. A few years back my friends looted some party we went to on nye and I woke up in the morning with all of this crap in my bag; an ipod dock (with huge speakers), a pair of mens jeans, dior handwash?, a potted plant and some roast chicken?! Which upon revealing one of them proceeded to eat. I tried to ask why they selected these particular items, but the couldn't remember... haha.

sarah

Madeline and Sophie said...

one day i came home from school and i found my hamster running around, turns out my dogs malled the cage. that evening i had to attend my sister's honor banquette and since i couldn't keep my hamster safe at home i took her in my purse!

andrea said...

A tube of wasabi paste!

A said...

my bunny rabbit!

Amanda said...

i took the peace train up to chicago a few years ago for an anti-war march, and came back with a purse full of conspiracy-theorist newsletters and a homemade dvd containing "TWO SHOCKING FILMS" about the TRUTH behind 9/11. plus a paper crane and a "kittens for peace" button i traded half a bag of skittles for.

A++ PROTEST, WOULD MARCH AGAIN.

KT said...

The remainder of my daughter's umbilical cord fell off in a cab. Wasn't sure what to do with it (toss it out the window? stuff it in between the seat?) so I stashed it in my purse so I could show it to my husband. This is the grody parent stuff that nobody tells you about.

muzzleloader said...

The weirdest thing I've ever carried in my purse sounds reallyyyyy creepy, but... a little boy's underwear.

My friend and I were visiting a buddy who was taking care of his nephew. We swam in his pool and afterwards we threw our suits in the dryer for a little while just so we didn't have to trudge back to NYC with a bag of wet stuff.

After we arrived back in NYC i pulled my bathing suit out of my purse and realized that there were a pair of the kid's underpants in there which I grabbed out of the dryer by mistake. :( I am officially a panty snatcher.

TigerLily said...

Umm, I have kept a bag of bagels (because they are just so delicious!), a potato gun, a Han Solo action figure, fake blood (please note, it was April! No where near Halloween!), and a shrub from my neighbors garden (longggg story!)

somlou said...

I'd say steamy dog shit is the most recent "weird item" I've toted around hoping not to run into a hot piece of ass and somehow reach in for my phone, bc (of course) he would want to swap digits, at which point, in some sort of Molly Ringwaldish spaz attack, I would, ultimately, pull out the bag of poop instead. Rad bags deserve rad owners.

Raúl Valdivia said...

umm I'm not sure if this applies but I think it was funny, I once was having lunch at work and my boss saw me and said: "Aren't you having anything to drink?" I said no and she pulled out a coke from her tote, and I said thanks but I don't drink coke and she pulled a sprite and I said thanks but I only drink natural and she pulled out a lipton tea and I burst out laughing.. it did happen. She also used to ring spontaneously and then you would se her digging into her very spacious bra looking for her cellphone.. lol

future sailor said...

in high school i carried around an electric razor. i went to catholic school and had to wear a skirt, so i would shave my legs like 4x a day.

Future Lint said...

I used to work with special needs teens for years and a few of the kids in wheelchairs had permanent catheters (you insert the tubing into their belly buttons so they can pee!) One of the boys left his catheter in bathroom at the zoo and his mom had already picked him up. Since I was in charge of the program and felt responsible for it's safekeeping, I just gave it a good rinse and kept it in my purse until I saw him on Monday...

T'Nealle said...

well were do i start... when i go on tour i have my entire life in my bag for two months like sleepingbag, undies, shirts, loads of tights, chocolate, mini bar bottles of liquor, cook books, normal books, shoes, note books , pens, colouring pencils, hot pants, stickers, microfiber towel, loads of electrical leads and adapters, broken computer and digi camera (arrrrrhhhhh don't ask) band merch (tshirts and a fer CDs).. seriously this is all in a small hand luggage size bag IT WAS INSANE living out of a bag for soooooo long...


From T'Nealle
http://wehavealwayslivedinthecastle.blogspot.com/

Samantha Chater said...

the weirdest thing? or most embarrass-omg thing?

- spare pair of underwear
- tea bags (fennel)- ew as if I was ever going to make tea with these now? yet i kept forgetting to throw them out?
- and home made fake blood and face putty (for a photoshoot) - glucose, choc syrup, red and blue colouring in case you were wondering

xx

Sam

Jjjane said...

a series of telescopes, ranging from tiny purple plastic to mid-sized astronomer's. they were, unfortunately, covered in peanut butter. perhaps it was sleepwalking, perhaps it were ghosts, but i woke up and went to school with them dirtying everything in my bag! i cleaned the scopes off and they're still fine. how good is that new lula?

Eyeliah said...

okay, I want to be honest but I also want to win sooooo….. I am going to go with honest. A pound of fat is the weirdest thing I’ve carried around. I used to work in weight loss, it’s gross and lumpy and makes you wanna throw up a lil in your mouth (fluff and hair gets stuck on it easily too). But it was a great visual aid.

lauren price said...

The first odd bag item that comes to mind is a pair of wisdom teeth. My oral surgeon saved them for me in a glittery tooth-shaped plastic holder! They're gigantic.

Helena said...

among other things i have carried
- a litter of 3 week old kittens (they had followed their momma when she went on a walk with me, and got tired halfway through)
- a container of miniature key lime pies
- all necessary items for the production of PB&J sandwiches
- a small bag filled with 1 bandaid, a handful of thumbtacks, and salt and pepper shakers covered in plastic wrap.
- a plastic bag filled with a beta fish.

Emily said...

I just came back from teaching school in Cambodia. While I was there, my black LuLu Lemon satchel was my best friend ( I know, social-status yoga wear is the WORST but it's a great bag). One day at the school, I found myself carrying around:
1 birthday card to a friend written in a jumble of English and Khmer
2 bottles of super scary 100% DEET bug repellent
3 flowers from the Plah Nah plant given to me by the mother of one of the girls I had been teaching as a thank-you gift
4 books: Love in the Time of Cholera, Cat's Cradle, Leaves of Grass, and an American Vogue (bought at the Taiwanese airport)
and finally
5 brand-new email addresses of some of my Cambodian students; we installed computers and internet at the school!
Maybe more sentimental than weird, but the juxtaposition was pretty surreal.

Sydney said...

Papau New Guinean ceremonial child's face mask complete with a full set of human teeth. It has a really great red in it, I was taking it to a paint store to see if they could match the color. My dad acquired many such artifacts during his 4-year stint as a village doctor in the mid-70s right after he'd finished medical school.

katia said...

weirdest thing hmmm. i have a few actually
1.clip in blue and black hair extensions (have no idea why i would carry those things around)

2. a shaving razor (once again i have no idea why...maybe if i forgot to shave?)

3. an bag full of rock, grass and dead flowers. From babysitting. those were in there for probably a good 2 weeks before i desided to get ride of them haha.

4. comdoms....not not comdom but plural! i think i had an entire box of condoms torn apart and all over the bottom of my bag that i forgot to take out after buying them.

But i have carried many many items in my purses from groceries while at university to bottles of alcohol sneaking into residance to underwear, bras and mr. noodle!

my bags are always fun to reach into and see what treasures i have! It is like the marry poppins bag of fun filled goodness!

kshuttle@uoguelph.ca

Thea said...

I kid you not, this actually happened to me:

A small bird got in my bag and I didn't know about it until I opened my purse to grab my wallet.

Madelyn said...

at any given time, you might find an apple (slightly novel), a razor (useful, but somewhat strange), a dead flower (vaguely romantic and sort of silly), underpants, tea bags (i dont even drink tea), a sewing kit, a pocket knife (for self defence? no! for cutting up apples!), condoms, nail files and jelly pens (purple/silver sparkley all the way!). i once had an entire bunch of bananas and a box of soaps in there too.

in terms of wallets, i just bought a liberty of london for target wallet. its FREAKIN HUGE but very easy to find in a tote, or in one's messy, messy room. its got all of these pretty flowers in pastel colors on it, but its not overly girly. urban has nice ones too, but i find they break too easily. i have a soft spot for trifold men's wallets (specifically a deep red leather one that was replaced by my target one recently), but theyre diffecult to find in over stuffed bags

Ross said...

oh I also carried around a broken canvas (For painting) and thirty year old Spanish newspapers. As well as Japanese family luck dolls (for finals week) and the first season of "Dead Like Me" and three pounds of wool and felt for craft projects during the stupid educational movies you watch to pass the time after finals are over.

Annabelle said...

I've had bath bombs from lush in there. They make your purse smell really good forever even if you just do it once! Not so weird, but oh well.
xoxo
Annabelle
ajabc94abc@yahoo.com

Kristen said...

I've had an actual set of dishes in my bag for about two days because I wanted to give my friend a cake, so I had a large dish and some plates and plastic forks/spoons/knives. The next day, she gave them back so I just stuffed them in there for a while. The best part is when another friend was complaining about holding a burrito that was falling apart and I whipped out a dish. =]

Love your blog,
Kristen
KristenOrola@gmail.com

niki said...

i've ended up at a bar after class and had all my school books with me in my backpack but that's not so weird as it is silly looking. i've found jars of curry sauce that my friends thought were funny to put in my purse while i wasnt looking at a party. similarly, i've been the one to carry the industrial size can of fruit cocktail out of a party because of my huge purse.

Ross said...

and I always carry pig shaped American flag painted coasters, cuz I don't like to leave a ring on people's furniture.

firefly said...

Dusty sour Skittles, a paper clip switchblade (for peeling oranges), a really small brass ring, a stuffed dumpling plushie, and random jewelry.

jade said...

whenever i find keys on the ground i put them on a spare keyring that i keep in my purse... you never know when you might find the right lock.

every time the fire alarm goes off in my building i load up my cat in my backpack & evacuate with him.

i once stole a bit of dry ice off my dad & wrapped it in newspaper so it wouldn't murder my tote.

Livy said...

The wierdest thing would be melted chocolate, and like 200 of those like tickets that come out of games at the arcade so you can get a dora watch (???)

http://livy-fashionnewbie.blogspot.com/

Miranda said...

one morning i woke up to find a garden gnome in my purse. it was a roomy bag, but the pointy hat was definitely poking out as i carried it wherever i was that night... luckily i don't remember.

CLAIRE said...

1. dog scat (in a doggie bag) because my poor pooch was sick and the vet needed a feces sample

2. hair dye for Georgina Stojiljkovic because I was assisting on a shoot and had to run out and get some for the hair stylist.

Hi and Lo times that my purse has seen.

Hayley said...

the other night i was wasted and went to the supermarket and bought a bbq chicken because i was super hungry. i then hid this in my bag so that i could get in a cab without feeling self concious. my marc jacobs still smells like chicky!

melina bee said...

Um, okay, I hate to say this, but here it is if I might win:
The weirdest thing I have ever had in my totebag has got to be cut up sheets from the night I lost my virginity (proof and all still there) that my totally psycho ex-boyfriend sent me a year after the fact. Love will make you do crazy things.

genevieve said...

two kiwis.

Shannon said...

SHRIMP

MY OLD HAIR WRAP

WHAT ABOUT BOB? ON VHS

brenda said...

Nachos. I stuffed them in my giant Betsey Johnson bag and ate them as I drunkenly stumbled back to my dorm. And no, they weren't in a container.

Sam Harvey Handbags said...

i think cheese grater lady should get it. great idea by da way! like kitty self defense thing.

Gee said...

before I had a cellphone in middle school, I used to want to carry around a bag because it looked cool. but I already had everything I needed in my backpack. so I stuffed toilet paper in a purse to make it look full and carried it around for weeks until my mom noticed and told me to stop being weird and carrying around an empty purse with toilet paper in it.

Jade said...

my aunts dead shitzu that had died while i was taking care of it...of natural causes, i had to run to the vet down the street in it to see if they could somehow ressusitate her...

sucky said...

I went to a fancy schmancy restaurant and they served me a slider on a little cast iron skillet. I put it in my purse and it's been there for a month. I keep finding it and then thinking that this would be a perfect time for someone to try to mug me, I could just clock them with a pan like a cartoon wife!

Once I also had a bag of dead baby chicks for taxidermy purposes.

and I always carry Toms Red Hot (hot sauce) with me everywhere.

shelbyyy said...

I used to go to school in Vegas so I'd end up with a lot of weird shit in my bag, but perhaps the weirdest that I still have [and recently rediscovered] is the phone number of a nearly blind "Mad Scientist" from Indiana.

I worked at the UNLV library computer help desk and this guy came in all the time [there was a special room for people with disabilities to do computer stuff] He was a nice guy, but this was Vegas and everyone who ends up there for more than a weekend is a little weird.

Apparently this guy also applied for a job at our campus Jamba Juice and he didn't have any prior work experience, so he thought writing "Mad Scientist" was an acceptable alternative.

Other than that, I am a traveling drug store. I always have hello kitty bandaids, neosporin, hand sanitizer, aleve, excedrin, dayquil, and a large bottle of acetaminophen. If you name it I probably lug it around with me.

I also currently have a smaller purse within my giant purse [no idea why] and a purse hook.

People always knock the purse hook, but when you're drunk and conveniently by an As Seen on TV store and/or carry as much crap as I do it's a great idea.

oh and in high school I used to carry around an coin purse makeup bag thing shaped like a pair of boys briefs. I used to whip it out at shows and ask band member type peoples to "sign my underwear." It was hilarious seeing the reactions of awkward indie guys having some underage girl ask them to sign her undies... that i pulled out of a purse I made from a pair of little girls shorts.

Kate said...

there's just no way i can top that first comment! ;) i found mushrooms in my friends purse once. chopped. she had no idea how they'd gotten there!

Magic said...

1. a small shaker of crushed red pepper (to put on anything bland that I might have to eat)

2. duct tape

J. W. F. said...

I usually have my Hello Kitty banana case with me; you never know when you'll have a banana and just dunno where to put it.

Also I ALWAYS have a collection of tiny amulets: ones that repel chaos, ones that attract chaos, and several that I've forgotten what they do.

Also, my menstrual cup.

pia said...

ha i legit put a child in my purse once, slung it backpack style. poor benji! he was a lot heavier than he looked...got some looks walking down the street.I felt bad though...it WAS really hot out and I WAS the one who forgot to bring any kind of water/sippy beverage that would prevent heatstroke...i almost DIED instead!
crazy is as crazy does, though.

get in touch with me (if need be)
@ http://lpp2010.wordpress.com

love your blog!

caitlin said...

My wisdon teeth!

A good friend of mine worked for an independent jewelry designer and I wanted to turn the teeth in to a necklace (have them gold plated and drill holes in the side...cool....right...).

But I kept forgetting to drop them off with her.

That was about a year ago, and I can't find them now.

Maia said...

i had to carry a hub cap in my school bag once. after the bus doped me off at school and proceed to leave, it left behind the hub cap which i still have. (I left it in my locker until the day was over though)

KD said...

Not that weird, but I've walked around with those really pointy mace-shaped nuts(?) and then poked myself every time I reached into my bag.

Alison said...

cigarette butts.
i was at the beach with friends and was annoyed with all the cigarette butts around us.
so i picked them up and put them in my purse so i could throw them away when we left.
but i forgot until that night...when i wondered why everywhere i went smelled like an ashtray.
in the words of w.l. "ooooopsydoops."

Julie Donovan said...

I once had a a garden gnome from Ross. Ive had a tiny Hello Kitty Sleeping bag and 3 wooden spoons (it was for a drama thing)in my Harajuku bag from 7th grade, Clerks II on dvd, pulp fiction play doh characters, and an abstract statue rattle of a jewish man that I never wanted to take out of my bag ever ever after my teacher gave it to me this year in english.

Jo said...

Jar of pickles, pulled out a friends house when meeting his new boyfriend. Later he asked my friend "whats with the pickles?". I'm forever known as pickles now.

Just a Generous Thief said...

Off the top of my head...a jar of tomato sauce, that I was delivering to my friend who had just got out of surgery. My nonna's tomato sauce cures all xx

human said...

weird things in my bag always make me wonder what a person would think if they jacked me. i hope they'd think i was really cool and feel bad. because i have had stuff like: an instructional book about how to pretend to be human when you're really an alien (useful), a beer bong (didn't really fit) and once, i reached into my purse and felt a lil nugget of mystery, which, upon closer inspection, turned out to be a teensy tiny glass frog. no idea how it got there, but i added it to my collection of tiny things anyway!

ami said...

Among the things that have been in my bag:

a vial of my own blood, for an art piece I was working on; pepper shakers, brandy snifters, coasters and other things stolen from bars; a baby squirrel who I found on the sidewalk and took care of for a day before animal services was available to collect her.

Other than these items, my bag is fairly pedestrian, but I do often find onion skins and broccoli leaves at the bottom.

Brooke said...

A cigarette lighter in the form of a miniature fire extinguisher.
you push on the handle and out comes fire!

ironic. X

Sonja said...

a little cactus that I named Atticus (I was bringing him home from my friend's house, this happens quite a bit), walkie-talkies and little smoke bombs (I bought them at a trick shop for kids so I would say their pretty safe) and some dinosaur soap from big lots, all at the same time.

JuliaMeade said...

My own urine, super nasty I know, during Junior year I it was doctors order's to obtain several samples throughout the day. Pee simply couldn't be carried along side my precious moleskin notebooks, or less precious tote items such as old bag balm and silly putty. I decided upon using a vintage Bottega lined with about 47 layers of paper towels as my own human waste carrier, as horrified as I was about spillage, style was still the clear priority! A finial word to the wise ladies, don't go 5 years sans carbs you may end up with this same ketone collection issue.

autumn. said...

A friend's sandwich holder, a plastic bag with a sandwich in it (completely unrelated to the previous item), a candle, and baby asprin. All at once. In my freshman year of high school.

bonjouritsjinah said...

Possibly the weirdest is some special pebbles stolen from around Jim Morrison's grave. I was in Paris in High School and my best friend was obsessed with the Doors. It's not like a tshirt would have been quite the same.

omg said...

I once carried around the tail of a piglet. We dissected them in science class and I cut if off! So sick! I liked how soft it was so I carried it around in my bag, secretly caressing it, for about a week before it started to freak me out. I couldn't bring myself to throw it out though, so I stuck it in the freezer.

Yes, Darling. said...

My nerf gun. The perfect sneak attack...

Alé said...

Well back in the day when I lugged around a HUGE yellow canvas/boho bag(?!), I Always Most Def HAD to have my violin (& it's bow), an infinite amount of ring pops, and a watergun spraypainted black (as to look real).

The Violin was to whip out at Annyyy random time and surprise whomever was around me, the Ring Pops were for grubbing on and giving away to see people smile and the fake gun, well er, that wasn't a great idea so I stopped with that one.

My fingers are XXXXRROOSSEDD !
CHEERS!

astroplankton@gmail.com
unaparolacattiva.blogspot.com

Mariondream said...

Weirdest thing: a homemade lollipop made in JAIL that my ex-graffiti writer boyfriend sent me from prison for VALENTINE'S DAY. It was several flavors and the stick was made from a Q-tip. TRUF! Sooo derelicte!!

Molly

abrasion said...

I cannot handle myself wıth junıor nınts. The lıttle devıls are so carefree they lıke to fall out of the box and ınto my purse.

Thıs has happened enough tımes to a frıend and I that we started referrıng to ıt as junıor mınt explosıons.

Thıs obvıously happened for the kagıllıonth tıme and sınce ıt was summer ıt made some crazytown homage to koons up ın my purse.

I am an art hıstory nork (nerd dork) and so ıt stayed.

xo
abrasıon

ps the smell of mınt ıs totally calmıng for gruesome am classes on baroque archıtecture.

pat said...

ideal notebooks are so great. Obviously not needed to be stated, but great taste.

You're even more of a babe now.

accidentallydomesticated said...

There's very little that hasn't been in my cavernous bag, but I like to think that if ever I was trapped somewhere hours of entertainment/sustenance would come from it's contents. Last check had a count of 7 opened packs of tissues (why?), lint roller, pack of superhero top trumps, a fossil, unidentified cables, an expired passport, amylnitrate, a Nelson Mandela cardboard air freshner thing & some steak. I live in fear of bouncers/doormen wanting to check my bag's contents.

Katie said...

one time, i ate half of a hot dog and put the other half in my bag to be eaten later in the night. naturally, i forgot about the lingering half-of-a-hot-dog until the next morning.

angrybeavers said...

have you ever been to the restaurant bertuccis? well in addition to giving crayons and coloring books to small children (and easily-bored-while-awaiting-food teenagers such as myself) they also give pizza dough. I stuck it in the tote bag I was carrying, left it in my car, and came back a week later. I cant even explain what the dough had turned into.... anywhoo The bag still smells like yeast, and a couple of the crayons melted while the bag was in my car.

Filister said...

well when i was younger i sneaked my pet-rat to school in my bag. a loooooooooooooooot of trouble for me

it was very dempting to write "and we never found her" in the end to make it more draumatic

David said...

Where are the dudes here? these bags aren't THAT girlie, and I WANT ONE.

The weirdest thing I ever carried in my bag was the end of my index finger. It sounds far more disgusting than it was. In my early chef days, one of the very tips was bound to go. It was iced in a small tupperware-style container, and then added to my everyday rucksack for transportation and eventual reattachment (though this wasn't required). You can't tell me that isn't weird.

And, I'm happy to report that all of my digits are in correct shape now.

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